The Weird World of Rare Cheeto Collecting: Jordan, Harambe, Penis and more

As the weekend comes to an all too soon close, I find myself scrolling through rare Cheetos for sale on eBay. How I ended up here is of no significant importance. So why don’t we just breeze right past that. I mean, it probably involves weed.

I was both amazed and terrified at what I discovered after typing “rare cheetos” into the eBay search bar. A strange world of rare Cheetos in the form of everything from Michael Jordan and Jesus, to Harambe and of course, dick and balls.

And amazingly people were buying!

The listing prices were astronomical. But there were some alleged purchases when I filtered by completed listings (it was a slow day). People were shelling out actual money for these though. The frivolity appalled me. However, I also thought maybe I’d head to 7-11 later, buy a bag of Cheetos to see what rarities I could find.

Here’s what I learned today about the rare Cheeto market on Ebay.

There’s a Lot of Cheetos for Sale that Look like a Dick and Balls

“Perfect Shape”. I don’t know — BUT if your balls look like that, you might want to call a doctor

I’m confused. Am I bidding on a “rare penis” Cheeto, or a regular penis shaped ”rare Cheeto”?

Dick and Balls shaped Cheetos actually sell

Someone shelled out over $5 (including shipping) to get their hands on this rare gem. Cool!

Well below the $1,025 asking price of the “perfect shape” edition, this rarity is just well, rare.

Harambe Shaped Cheeto is kinda cool and sold for $40,000!!!

Holy Harambe!!!

This Cheeto shaped like Harambe sold for $40,000! I have to say this was my favorite of the collectibles. If you got an extra $40 G’s, why not?

Harambe Shaped Cheeto is re-listed for…$40,000?

Hmm. This is suspicious. The same Harambe Cheeto that “sold” for $40K is back on sale for — $40K. Given eBay’s fees this doesn’t seem like a sustainable business model. Welcome to the weird world of eBay hustlers…

Kim Kardashian has a Rare Cheeto

The Kardashian’s are everywhere. They might even be in your bag of Cheetos, stoner. One can only wonder what the best offer was for this abomination. $24,399?

Crying Jordan and Air Jordan Both Have a Rare Cheeto

Yup, looks just like him. I think they talk about this is in the Last Dance finale.

The resemblance is remarkable — If Jordan played his career as a pile of corn meal and cheese powder. Kind of looking like the Elephant Man getting up IMO.

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So that’s how this weekend ends. We definitely had some better moments during the week like our interview with Estevan Oriol or when we talked about the demand for cannabis professionals. Keep it Loud fam!